Uh...thank you but no thank you.

.

Missing most of the soft feminine bits, too many muscles and the breasts look suspiciously fake.

Why do they do this?
...

What will it look like in 20 years?

.

Oh bugger!

.

Action and, predictably, reaction.

.

(Click to enlarge)

.

God and the flavour of semen.

.

You know why God is a man?
Because if God was a woman she would have made
sperm taste like chocolate.
-- Carrie Snow

Well, this quote was in an email I was sent. At first I accepted it at face value. it is a joke, after all.

But there is room for a dissenting view. Or two.

View 1: If God was a man, he WOULD have made sperm taste like chocolate to make blow jobs more attractive to women.

View 2: If God was a woman, she would have made man flexible enough to lick his own balls. Most other animals can.

Of course, there is the distinct possibility that an early ancestor of man, Homo oblivious, could give himself a blow-job but such pursuits would have made him easy prey to sabre-tooth tigers and such like and that branch of the family tree died out.
...

Is that a bag of treats I see?

.

I don't believe him.

Had an email from an acquaintance, saying that he was sorry he hadn't seen me recently...

...but he now had a new circle of friends.

I think he is dreaming.

Here is his circle of friends:


...

Nothing much changes...

.
..

And when she was bad...

.

Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman
- or a bad woman; it depends on how much happiness you can handle.

- George Burns.

...

Climbing the ladder, rung by rung.

.

Don't jump to conclusions.

It's Vladimir, 3rd from the left, who gives the blow jobs.
...

More on flowers

.

Will it matter in the end?

.

Photo stolen shamelessly from Boneman's blog.

Perhaps his pick-up line would be:

"Would it be the end of the world to have sex with me?"
...

Carpel knowledge.

.

Blue Balls? The cure is coming.

.

"'Blue balls' is a widely used colloquialism describing scrotal pain after high, sustained sexual arousal unrelieved because of lack of orgasm and ejaculation. It is remarkable that the medical literature completely lacks acknowledgment of this condition. The case reported here illustrates that a good history may help make the diagnosis, offer the possibility of prompt relief, and avoid any unnecessary evaluation. "

Pediatrics, vol 106, No 4, October 2000, p843.
.

Uh...

.

Um...I...well...it...does...but...nah, I don't understand.

How bizarre is this? What is it supposed to do? Does it only stay on while you have an erection? And that dandy little pointy thing would bring a tear to your girlfriends eye and play merry hell with a condom.

Can anyone explain it? And, if yes, please explain how you know.
...